Six by Six

In my defense, I haven't done a meme in a long, long time. Maybe all year. Since the Sundry End-of-the-Year meme. And I'm sick. I have a cold, which has left me weak and tired and maybe a little bit on the cranky side. And Dad is back home and there's not a lot I can do to help but I can do meal plans and grocery shopping and this has made my life infinitely more complicated. Not to complain. Just to explain. So I'm following Carmen's lead because the girl knows complicated.

Six Things I Could Live Without, but It Wouldn't be Pretty:

1.  Non-fat lattes
2.  Concealer
3.  Pony-tail holders
4.  Contact lens
5.  My Blackberry
6.  Access to New Orleans Saints games

Six Movies I’ve Never Seen Before

1.  The Princess Bride

2.  The Wizard of Oz

3.  Close Encounters of the Third Kind

4.  Avatar
5.  Silence of the Lambs
6.  Deep Throat

Six of My Pet Peeves

1.  When the doorbell rings and Chip says, "Who is that?" as if I have Xray vision or something.
2.  When construction takes the road down to one lane with barrels blocking it off and drivers go like 20 mph. Why does one lane scare you? How many lanes were you driving in before???
3.  Repetitive noises like when someone rattles their keys.
4.  People who talk in paragraphs when all I really need is bullet points.
5.  When I'm trying to get dinner on the table and members of my family decide that now would be the perfect time to bring all their dirty cups and glasses to the sink and maybe I'll just wash my hands while I'm here and OMG what are you doing now?? What? Me? I just wanted to get a drink of water. OMG GET THE HELL OUT OF MY WAY I'M TRYING TO GET DINNER ON THE TABLE.
6.  Flies.

Six Things I Really Love Doing

1.  Reading

2.  Writing

3.  Baking
4.  Napping
5.  Eating ice cream
6.  Crossword puzzles
 

 Six TV Shows I Enjoy

1.  House
2.  The West Wing
3.  Buffy the Vampire Slayer
4.  Project Runway
5.  Friday Night Lights
6.  The Amazing Race

Six Jobs I Have Held

1.  Senor Taco
2.  Data Entry at Terry Bradshaw's country club
3.  Daycare teacher
4.  Communications & PR for St. Jude
5.  Waitress at Chili's
6.  Waitress at The Bottom Line which sounds like a strip club but it totally was not. It was a corner bar-slash-sports bar kind of place.

Six Books I've Never Read

1.  One Hundred Years of Solitude
2.  Any of those sparkly vampire books
3.  Moby Dick
4.  Lord of the Rings
5.  Million Little Pieces
6.  Catcher in the Rye

Six Movies I will ALWAYS Watch That Prove I'm Totally Shallow

1.  Urban Cowboy
2.  Selena
3.  The Breakfast Club (Does that say "shallow?" Or just "young?" "Young at heart" maybe?)
4.  Wolverine (And here's why: because I only watch it for the Tim Riggins scenes.)
5.  The Outsiders (Come ON. Every cute boy from my teen years is in that movie.)
6.  Evita (When the crowds are standing below her window, singing out to her, in kinda sounds like they could be singing, "Ka-leeeeee-sa, Ka-leeeeee-sa" doesn't it? Yeah, it doesn't get much more shallow than that.)






If you pick this up for your blog or facebook page, leave the link in the comments section. x

Happy Birth Day

Seventeen years ago today, I was at the hospital, determined to get through this thing without drugs. When the contractions came, I screamed. I squeezed Chip's hand. I cursed.

But Elijah was a good baby from the beginning — even the labor went quickly. And by dinner time, I had a tiny little very perfect baby boy in my arms. He ate well. He slept well. He was easy to potty train. I often said that your first baby is always the easy one; that's how God tricks you into having more. You're all, "Oh hell, this is easy! I can do this!" and then He slams you with the child from hell. But the joke was on God. I stopped after the first.

Elijah was a deeply spiritual and compassionate child. He was wonderful with kids younger than him and would've made a fabulous big brother. He's played basketball since he was about 5, I think. It was a good choice since he eventually grew to over 6 feet tall. In high school, he joined the rugby team as well. I still don't know all the rules but I sure do enjoy watching him play. Who knew had had such toughness in him?

I'm a right-brained girl who gave birth to a left-brained boy. By middle school, Elijah could do math in his head that I had to scratch out on paper. In high school, he was acing chemistry and physics. His favorite show on TV is Myth Busters.

This is his last year of high school. He's closer to the grown man that he will be than the little boy that he was. Raising him has been such a wonderful blessing for me that I would give anything to be able to do it all over again. Not because I would change anything. Not because I can't let him go. Simply because I enjoyed it that much.

Elijah, you are a delight, and you always have been. I love you, my son. Happy, happy birthday to you. It certainly was a happy birth day for me.

What a week.

Someone said to me that they couldn't believe how much I had posted this week, given all that's been going on. I responded, "How could I *not* write?" I mean, given all that's been going on.

I started out Monday feeling overwhelmed by your outpouring of Kindness. To be honest, I'm still kind of basking in it. And the great thing about the internet, I can go back and read the kind notes and comments again and again and again.

Tuesday I started talking about the Healing. And writing about the healing has helped to actuate the healing.

I also wrote a guest post at Whatever Nation about the biological reason why your teenager acts like a moron. (Spoiler: He can't help it.)

And in fashion, there was the rumor that Marc Jacobs is branching out into plus-sized clothing that got me thinking about where to find stylish clothes in those sizes. And don't forget, while you're over there, there's just a couple days left to enter to win a beautiful piece of Shining Stones jewelry.

Wednesday, my life turned into a damn Nicholas Sparks movie. (Another spoiler: It had a happy ending.) And over at No Excuses, I advised on Funeral Fashion. Oh yes, I did just go there.

Yesterday I slacked off. And today, I have a post at No Excuses about my new ring! With a bonus discount code for you to get some jewelry too. So make sure you check that out.

Tonight there is dinner with one of my favorite families followed by the GHS vs. CBHS game: The Battle of the Alma Maters. (I'll be cheering for Elijah's Red Devils!). Kiss your babies and have a lovely weekend, my friends.
x

I'm thinking Rachael McAdams...as Me.

I swear to God, Nicholas Sparks could not make this shit up if he tried.

So let's review where we finished reading yesterday, shall we? The 89-year-old father has fallen and broken some ribs. He was in the hospital for about 10 days and now he's been in the Jewish Home rehab area for about two weeks. While he's in the home, his wife of 68 years has passed away. The family went to St. Louis for the funeral, so she could be laid to rest next to her daughter, who died of cancer 14 years ago. Dad is unable to attend Mom's funeral because he can't make the trip to St. Louis.

I agree, children, it is a very sad story. So let's see what tonight's chapter holds...

********
The Jewish Home has decided they must send Dad home. He is thrilled by this news, as all he's done since he's been there is to say, "I want to go home. I want to go home." Sadly, they are not sending him home because he is rehab'ed and ready. Rather, he's been ornery and uncooperative and has refused to do his physical therapy, so it is necessary for him to give up the bed. The home is full, with a waiting list, and can not allow him to stay if he is not working to improve.

Chip and his two brothers went to tell Dad he is going home. "Mom will not be there," they reminded him. "But Rocco is there! He misses you and can't wait for you to come home."

A Family Heals.

Mom's services were held this weekend in St. Louis. It was her wish to be buried next to her beloved daughter, Ellen, who we lost to cancer 14 years ago. Being with family for two days was hugely cathartic for me. So much love and support and grace.

I'm not even sure how much of it I'm ready to talk about yet. So many tears were shed. I will say this, though: the time I spent with the family — mourning, remembering, crying, laughing, hugging, holding — was far more healing for me than the actual service was. The service was beautiful, and I felt much more at peace after it was over. But I believe the real healing took place in communion with loved ones. Which is another reason why your kind words and messages have been so helpful to me.

Kindness.

Remember when that blogger tweeted for prayers because her baby had fallen in the pool? And then that horrible sucky lady was all, "I don't think this is even true. I think she just did this to increase her stats. Who would twitter at a time like that anyway?"

I'm here to answer that question: ME. I would twitter at a time like that.

Last week, I twittered and facebooked and blogged the loss of my mother-in-law. And I didn't do it to increase my stats and I didn't do it to impress you all with my fabulous prose. I did it because, from the very first 140-character update at 10 o'clock on Wednesday night from the ICU, I received an incredible outpouring of love and support from the online community. The kind words and notes of good thoughts and prayers became the one thing I could rely upon to get me through the heartbreaking events that unfolded.

And the thing was, I never expected it.

I mean, I expected a little bit of it. I expected maybe a tenth of the @ replies and DMs and text messages and wall posts and comments and emails that I received. I never expected to be so completely overwhelmed with such heartfelt messages. I thought that things like that only happened to the online A-listers but what I've learned is that this community doesn't really care who you are when you're hurting. It reaches out and gathers you up in its virtual arms and says, "Don't worry...we got you."

And it made me cry. A lot. Like every time I'd check my messages. Because I just felt so loved.

I wish I could personally thank each and every one of you who reached out to me last week. But I wouldn't even know where to begin. So thank you. And you and you and you and all of you. Thank you from the bottom of my heart. I do not have the words to express how very, very much it has meant to me.

Life. And Death.

August 19, 1:06 p.m.
I am less than five minutes from the hospital when I get a call from Chip. I answer it but he doesn't say anything. Then just howling sobs. "Oh honey, hold on," I say. "I'll be there in a minute."

Life. And Death. 
She married Jerry in 1942, when she was just 17 years old. She was a humble hat shop girl, he, a navy instructor headed for war. It's what they did in those days. Their first home was a "one bedroom with kitchen privileges," a fact she liked to share with her children as they each moved into their first wedded home. They were married a little over 68 years. She had eight babies, four living children, eight grandchildren and eight great-grandchildren. And no divorce. For all those generations of off-spring, Jerry and Estelle have set the example for loving, dedicated commitment.

Chip was with her when she passed. He sat next to the bed and took her hand. "I love you, Mommy. I'm here." and just like that, the monitor flat-lined. And she was gone. How does the soul know to leave the body at the exact moment when the heart stops beating, the lungs cease taking in breath? Where does it go? Did she float up by the ceiling, looking down on the scene? I wish I had thought to look, to see if she was there. How does the soul know where to go? Is there a light to follow? Jennifer Love Hewitt to guide her? Is Ellie calling her from the other side, anxious, finally, after 14 years, to reunite with her beloved mother?