"Blogging from the backyard"

Guess where I am? I'm blogging from the backyard.

(Unrelated: I think it's funny that Blogger spellcheck doesn't recognize the word "blogging." Or "Blogger," for that matter.)

I found an amazing end-of-season deal on a patio furniture set, and convinced Chip to buy it. So we'd have more FAMILY TIME. The boxes arrived Friday, and yesterday morning we were out putting that mug together.

And by "we," I mean "Elijah and Chip." Obviously.

I especially love how the patio is right next to the two AC units. That will make for some wonderful evenings outside.

I SAID, 'THAT WILL MAKE FOR SOME WONDERFUL...' Oh, nevermind.

I probably wouldn't have had this much help had it not been a beautiful morning in the 70s. Luckily, the project involved little more than attaching legs to a tabletop, because let's face it: we are not the handiest of families.For my part, I sat in this chair, reading out the instructions.

Because somebody has to be in charge. And I'm the best reader.

Also snapping photos.

I prefer to call it "historical documentation."

And harassing Chip about cutting the packaging with a boning knife instead of utility scissors.

Damn, I can't believe I missed this opportunity to say, "Ken ewe bun a deck?"*

For his part, Smokey laid in the grass, chewing on a dental bone.

I love him like my furry child, but I'm not paying $500 to have his teeth cleaned.

Also pacing around nervously and nudging me with his nose.

What u humanz doing in ma yard?

When Elijah applies for Engineering school, I'm totally just attaching these photos to his application.

Essay schmessay. I can build a table, yo.

Attention childless couples: This is totally why you have children. So they can do all the bendy work and you can stand around and watch them. And snap photos. For historical documentation.

Anyone who's ever read Tom Sawyer knows it's surprisingly easy to get someone else to do your manual labor for you.

Alas, the umbrella came with no instructions. Elijah said, "I think umbrellas are pretty self-explanatory." How quickly the boy does forget into what family he has been borne. I believe in this photo, a discussion was underway as to whether or not the little stopper thing should be removed before inserting said umbrella.

Then Elijah broke the stopper in two, so that solved that.

After much turning of the crank, the umbrella-ella-ella began to open.

A crank? Seriously? Do they not make electric umbrellas yet?

Aaaand...we're in business.

And ready for action

Now all I need is a pool.

*- translation: "Can you bone a duck?" with a very thick French accent. From the movie Julie & Julia. Funny to hear and very fun to say.