My reality TV crack

I say that I don't watch reality TV, but I have to admit that my Sunday evening routine does include 60 Minutes followed by The Amazing Race. Even though the teams I like - old people, coal miners and gay Hispanic men - never win.

In tonight's finale, the final 3 comprises The Barbies, Charla & Mirna (a.k.a. The Team w/ The Little Person) and That Couple Who Met On Their First Race But Were On Different Teams That Time. Not really who I would have predicted early on.

The Barbies probably deserve to win. They come in first A LOT, which means that they're technically pretty good at playing the game. Plus, you gotta give them some credit for staying positive in all situations. Almost all the teams break down and lose it and scream at each other at times, but not the Barbies. I guess all that beauty pageant training is paying off.

Still, I do not want them to win, because first and foremost, I don't think they play fair. All's fair in love and war and world travel for a million dollars, but they've pulled some shitty moves to get ahead. Like yielding The Couple Team when they didn't have to, for one. And thinking they can get special treatment by flashing their bright white caps. Which, a lot of times they do, but it's pretty fucking hilarious when they don't (like when they had to clean those military planes and that Air Force dude was having none of it). Plus, they're snotty. I propose that no one who is snotty should be allowed to win a million dollars ever for anything.

Then there's Charla & Mirna. Who I should totally be pulling for, since my preference is generally for the underdog and how much more disadvantaged can you be in a RACE than to be a little person?? But these two have a severe mark against them, too - the tall one has a super-annoying habit of talking to everyone in some crazy fake accent. Which is totally offensive considering that they're in foreign countries, right?

So that leaves The Couple. While I've not been partial to them (except when they kept getting yeilded, I did kind of feel sorry for them then) they don't have any black marks against them, so they're going to be my pick to win. Even though Girl-Couple does always seem to have her cleavage thrust into the camera. Still, I'm not going to fault a contestant for having big girls and maybe she just needs to wear that pink sports bra thingie as a shirt on every leg of the race because racing is hot, hard, athletic work.

Anyway, the teams are on their way to San Fran now, so in 20 minutes we'll know. Go Dating Couple Team People!